37 Days to Zen, 30 and a Wake-Up


T minus 1 and a wake-up.

I am only hoping I continue waking up, as my left arm is still numb and has now started to creep up into my neck. I wish this were a made up scenario for this series, but it’s not.

I am very apprehensive now.

I have Googled the symptoms for a heart attack 12 times, and they haven’t changed yet.

Breakfast would have to be something light, so a Monster and a sausage egg and cheese biscuit from a gas station nuclear heating container would do.

It might have been the possible heart attack I was having, but I passed up the Little Debbie end cap without blinking my eyes, which is a new thing for me.

I still have complete functionality with the arm; it just feels like it has been asleep since the last time I had sex.

And since I am left handed, it actually has been asleep since the previous time I had sex…with myself.

Stress about my arm leading into lunch didn’t help out at all, but being as this is the last day I had before I started judging myself, I figured I would make it count so that I could reminisce about days like today when I am all healthy and hungry.

A full medium meat lovers from Papa Johns, with extra meat on top of the extra meat.

If you have a better eating experience than taking a bite from a Papa Johns pepperoncini pepper, finishing the last bite of pizza with sauce, and dipping the crust into the patent pending garlic sauce created by Cupid, then I would love to hear it.

But not during my 30 days to Zen, as it would only piss me off if your story did sound better and I couldn’t eat it without making myself throw it up shortly after.

Cause, you know… Zen

Oh yeah, I was way too full to eat dinner, or so I thought, but I was passing an Arby’s on the way home, and that thought changed. A few roast beef sliders later, and by few I mean four, didn’t seem to hurt at all.

It would be the last time I could get away with it, and it might be just in time for the health of my heart.

I would have to take the sleeping pills an hour early, as I was a bit excited for some change in my life.

Real change, not the hope and change thing from years back that someone came up with.

Real change.

Maybe it’s time for all of us to figure out the change we need in our lives while on this blue marble… and if it’s your time, good luck.

If it’s not, enjoy the next 30 Days to Zen on my quest for change.


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