Attempting to order sweet tea in Missouri and being told the restaurant is out of sugar is the devil and not even the Vicki Vallencourt’s boobies type of devil, it is absolutely unexpected, like a Spanish Inquisition. This is a fascinating predicament for a restaurant in the Midwest where sugar is treated as a primary food group and a God-given right. Sadly, they did not have any tea brewed nor enough sugar for more, so I settled for a standard lemonade. It earned a 2.5 score because it was just basic wetness that was cold enough to be refreshing but lacked the soul I was looking for. 

For the appetizer at Crave Mediterranean, we ordered the Arayes which is essentially a Mediterranean quesadilla. You can get them with grilled meat or cheese but I ordered both because I enjoy living dangerously. The meat and cheese were tucked inside a crispy pita bread that was grilled to a perfect crunch. The seasoning was a massive curveball because it had a distinct flavor that reminded me of a high-end hot dog or a smoked sausage. It was obviously beef but the flavor profile was closer to a summer cookout than what one would expect from a traditional Lebanese dish.

It was a strange experience, feeling like I was at a ballpark while snacking on a sausage pitadilla but I am not complaining because it was tasty as hell. I dipped a corner into the house garlic sauce which was pungent enough to ward off a legion of vampires from three blocks away. This sauce is for the enthusiasts who want to taste garlic for the next forty-eight hours. I am not a sauce guy but it might be my go-to Mediterranean sauce now.

I gave the Arayes a 3.2 score. They were solid and I would eat them again even if my brain was confused by the flavor profile.

Updates:

You might catch me this weekend at the ZZ Top concert with EMA/CERT. This is exactly why I have been telling you to come to the monthly meetings. You learn how to keep people from bleeding out but the perks could involve getting into events like this while everyone else is stuck in the nosebleeds or paying a month’s mortgage for a ticket. You should come for the survival skills and stay for the potential backstage access.

You may also catch me and my girl riding around this weekend at the Ozark Rides Rally. If you see us be sure to say howdy and pay her a compliment because she has been a little down lately and deserves it. And please, no Jada Pinkett Smith jokes, I’ve been slapped before.

Books:

I finally finished Morningwood. It was a decent read but it felt like a slow burn for at least two-thirds of the book before the pace finally decided to wake up. It follows a mimic demon with zero morals and features some high-definition descriptions of the ladies in the story that I did not hate.

I have moved on to Discount Dan and I am actually into it. It is a LitRPG about a Marine in a bathrobe who noclipped into the Backrooms which is a nightmare dimension made of endless malls and laundromats, scary, right?! His sidekick is a talking blue rubber/plastic dog named Croc who has a New Zealander accent and an obsession with Twilight. The discount premise is a hilarious shift from the norm and it is keeping me hooked. 

All shirts at Unstable Apiary Designs are on sale until Bee Conference Season in June so go grab some fresh gear while the prices are low and the designs are still in stock. 

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