Howdy Y'all, I know it has been a terribly long time since I have posted anything on Chop's Guide to the Galaxy but I do have a good excuse, I am a lazy bastard. Most of Chop's Guide has been written during downtime at work, and since being a bondsman, I have worked and … Continue reading Sail Away with Me
Cost of living
A Cuddle with a Month Long Struggle.
I quickly hopped out of bed before being crushed and grabbed a quick shower and walked out to find Gary oddly trying to cuddle up to Chop in what looked like a scene from a cheap porn hub video We may not have actually learned anything to do with bail bonding, but hey, at least it wasn't fun either.
Have You Ever Thought About Marrying a Girl You Never Met?! I Have. Here is my Story.
A Belarus Bride is an excellent group of individuals trying to help lonely bastards such as myself out, and I really would recommend them if you can deal with having a mediator and not being able to send the gifts that you wish to send. I know they have helped a lot of guys get away from the modern westernized woman and I think all the time about trying this again because a part of me wants to belong to someone… Someone who is most likely not here in the states.
Tales From This Mortal Coil – я люблю тебя, סַבתָא
I say impatience is a virtue, I have dealt with enough bad things in my life to know tomorrow is not guaranteed.
Where should we go in Japan?
I was warned to never stray past the 3rd floor of the Manga shops in Akihabara because the porn gets weirder the higher you go. What I heard was, start on the fourth floor and work your way up and after warning Angelina, it seems she heard the same thing as me because she demands we go higher than the third floor. God, I love her. Check back in, like, share and comment, especially if you have been to Tokyo and can give us some useful tips or ideas.
Orale Vato, What’s Happening?
First and foremost, I have moved from Lake of the Ozarks, Missouri back home to Poplar Bluff, Missouri.
The Big Gap
Stop laughing, dick.
The Polls are in! We are all Screwed!
I really hope you share every Chop's Guide you read on your social media because it helps me reach all the corners of the world but this one could be the most important post I have ever written (so far) and I ask you to please share it, no matter where you are from. If you are from Missouri and reading this, it counts double for you... you may not have the same Commissioner, Assessor or Sheriff but please learn more about people running for state level positions and PLEASE share this post.
Parenting: What You’re Doing Wrong. If You’re a Shit Parent.
If your pre-pubescent child is biting you/hitting you/kicking you and rather than punting that little bastard across the room, you call 911, you have failed as a parent and it will never get any better. That kid now knows you have absolutely no power. You should send that kid off to military school or something because that kid is going to grow up to be a piece of shit otherwise. Probably just like you.
Don’t Forget to Pack a Wife!
I do not know yet how much these visas will cost but I can not wait to find out, Cambodia may be the new digital nomad capital of the world. Bye, Bye Chiang Mai, which is cool too because then when I go to Chiang Mai, I won’t have to deal with so many fucking white people.
Chop's Guide to the Galaxy 